Upon Linen We Gather – Lulama Wolf

The African vernacular experience is a tapestry of language and its dialects, familial cultural norms and their tribal nuances, the pursuit of greatness anchored in the gravitas of communal duty. It is on this tapestry of intersectional culture, in a west London gallery that my social axis is tilted.

SoShiro Gallery – Marylebone, London

The door is opened by a tall, beautiful woman, with a dreadlocked ponytail, who welcomes us with homely ease. The gallery, at first sight, looks like its former life, a Georgian Marylebone white terraced home. This style of display is a far echo from the white-walled gallery norm. Instead, the works hang against floor-to-ceiling geometric walls. The featured pieces of contemporary furniture give the art a familial and intimate poise, making the majestic attainable, liveable.

I later learn that the woman is Shiro Muchiro, Kenyan born interior architect and founder of SoShiro Gallery. Her work centers on mixed media collaborations and expanding our experience beyond museums into lived spaces.

Nomaza Nongqunga Coupez – SoShiro Gallery

We turn into what would’ve been the living room and in it stands an icon in the South African art industry, Nomaza Nongqunga Coupez, draped in copper-orange velvet. The France-based entrepreneur and founder of Undiscovered Canvas, with a focus on “promoting investment in African arts”, greets us wholeheartedly. The girl had a split second to decide who I’d be in this narrative, but fangirl and hype-woman be my original nature! I Marylebonically, black-girl-in-an-art-gallery, lost my mind. She gracefully talks us through some of the pieces she’s curated for this exhibition. Her pride is that of a midwife, holding a new born in the air.

Luluma Wolf during her residency with Undiscovered Canvas – Antibes, France

The African perspective is a common caricature in western culture. We are not often set up as intelligent, fully formed, positive contributors to our own narrative and to the world’s at large. But here I am, in a house exclusively dedicated to showcasing Luluma Wolf’s phenomenal work. Her art embodies a strong African vernacular language with a contemporary tone. She peels at the layers surrounding pre-colonial dignity and spirituality. In this collection of Ndizalwe Nge Ngubo Emhlophe (I was born wrapped in a white blanket), she works through the mediums of acrylic paint mixed with Mediterranean sand, carefully stroked onto linen canvas. It is upon her linen canvases that we gather and marvel. The work is gritty yet gentle. The prominent eye is a call, a cry, a conversation, a prayer.

Nomaza and Luluma – Antibes, France

The evening ends with communion and warm drinks. At this point, we have also met Mae, Maya, and Elle of Zambian descent. Nomaza is generous with her time and heart. We all share a full spread of hope and the lessons of lived moments. We loan each other courage; we barter in beauty and purpose. I remember my WHY and breathe in this answered prayer.

I STAN every single woman I met on this day: their generosity of spirit, their intelligence, and the important work they do for black women. You don’t know you are writing an International Women’s Month piece until you are writing one.

[There were guys too, like my friend David who shared it all with me 🙂 ]

Late 20.

What do we do with the unbuild dreams, and the roofless careers? How do we admit, ’This is not how I thought it would be’? But even more frightening, how do we make new dreams at our big age?

Excuse my long silence.

It’s 05:30. My eyes reluctantly peel open into consciousness; I stay on my back and wait… but nothing. The dark has not come for me today, dread isn’t fluttering over my stomach before taking over my body. Gloom has released me from its hold, the light outside is suddenly the light within, and I have somehow survived my mind. Life’s transitions can be as simple as witnessing an erupting butterfly, as devastating as the loss of a loved one, as magical as a new baby, as necessary as a tired soul’s protest.

Nobody warns you about the big bus that hits you in the late 20’s. How the adolescent coping mechanism of your early 20’s will turn into inadequate scaffolding under the demands of adult life. How your relationship with your parents will have to change if you do not want to inherit their ghosts.  

Nobody warns you about waking up to a deep sense of unfulfilled potential. I am grateful for everything I have accomplished by God’s grace so far. I also acknowledge that this bountiful harvest of progress cannot be sacrificed at the altar of ‘Whats Next’. But there are also parts of me that feel unlived, and I hadn’t been honest about that disappointment. The best lies are the ones we tell we tell ourselves. Like the rift between two cliffs, I was experiencing the distance between the ideologies I hold about my life and my actual daily reality.

What do we do with the unbuild dreams, and the roofless careers? How do we admit, ’This is not how I thought it would be’? But even more frightening, how do we make new dreams at our big age?

Sometimes I am Adam in the garden and God is asking ‘where are you’, not as a point of judgment but as a call to consciousness and accountability.

When the clouds parted, and the light without was the light within, I realised that my work is in honoring my younger self and the choices she made with what information she had. She got me here.  My work is dreaming out what can still be and navigating towards that future fiercely. I am to never wage war against myself.

My job is in choosing the daily habits that cement the life I believe I was created to live, accepting time’s hand, accepting love. Sometimes it’s as small as switching off the TV for a book, or as big as a career change. It’s doing the things I say I will do and forgiving myself quickly when I don’t.

I am taking full shape, gently breaking into new skin, proud of every stretch mark.